but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
My vagina is officially offended.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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