She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
