oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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