my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
two words: eviction party
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
