Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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