I wannas sexs uuuuu
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize
