lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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