so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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