No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I'm determined to sit on that face.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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