Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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