So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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