So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I yelled at your uterus for you.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
