Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
It's blow job season.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
