Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
