He asked to "fluff my boner.."
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
