"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
