We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
The feeling are messing with the penis
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
