waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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