K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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