kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
We are all done wearing pants today
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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