anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
