Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
