this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize