He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
