i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Randomize