Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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