So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize