How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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