I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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