There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Randomize
