He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
