I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
