I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Randomize
