Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
