angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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