pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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