puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
