Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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