Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
