His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Randomize
