Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
