The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
