I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
