Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Randomize