Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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