Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
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