Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
