bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
