A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
