you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
