Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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